Sand or city, home is where the heart is...

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I'M BAAAAAACK!

I can hear Mother Gulf saying "Welcome back, Tiff, we have missed you"

I'm back from paradise. We just spent a week among the powdery sand of Crescent Beach and I have a renewed sense of self and a peace that I haven't felt in a while. There is something about the sound and smell of the ocean that soothes my soul. I am never happier than when I am with my family, but being with them at the beach makes my heart sing. I loved getting up every morning and heading down to the water to hunt sea shells as a family. These are the memories that I will always treasure. To paraphrase the great philosopher, Dr. Suess, 'my heart grows two sizes' when I sit on the shore line and watch my three greatest, goggle-clad loves, dive for the booty. It's in those moments of complete simplicity that I realize that I am, indeed, the luckiest gal in the world.

Home is where the heart is, and at this particular time, home is diving for shells in the Gulf of Mexico.

While we were out and about, Ali found a shirt that she said was "SOOOOO me". Upon seeing it, I agreed and it was my first souviner from the trip.

This pretty much sums me up

 When I go to the ocean, my goal is always the same;

   1) OD on Vitamin D *tan fat looks WAY better than pale fat*

   2) EAT LOTS OF 'JUST PLUCKED FROM THE OCEAN' CRAB LEGS!

   and finally

   C) Find drift wood, sea glass, and a shark tooth

The first two are always easy to do. Option C, however, usually presents itself to be a challenge. However, on this trip to sandy heaven, the stars we aligned. We set sail (technically, we set gas pedal) to the black sands of Casperson Beach where we heard we would have a good chance of finding shark teeth. Well, when I heard this my ears perked like Hanks when we ask if he wants to get the paper. We readied our goggles and colanders (what else would rednecks use to sift through the bottom of the ocean?), and hit the hotter than Haities sand of Casperson. Two hours later, we left there with 17 SHARK TEETH, A PEA SIZE PIECE OF SEA GLASS AND SECOND DEGREE BURNS ON OUR LOWER DIGITS! #sharkteethwhisperers #blisterydermis #ouchbutsoooooworthit

Some of the teeth we found, plus the little piece if sea glass

Truth be told,  my trip was made at that point. We could have come home then,with only a mild tantrum on my part, but we had 5 more glorious days to use up! We strolled the lovely Siesta Key Village, where I saw this signage on the side of a building. I WILL make it a part of my kitchen somehow!!!!

We took nightly walks along the beautiful Gulf, where we saw this awesome sight.

But best of all, we did this stuff as a family. We made memories, and relaxed, and laughed... TOGETHER!

Home is where the heart is, and at this particular time, home is holding hands on the beach, reading her required reading for honors History (Ali, who would not let me get her picture while nerding it up), and playing soccer on the beach.

But, like everything, this too must come to an end, so on Friday night we started packing and 'getting our affairs' in order. (I know I make it sound like a death, but the end of vacation kinda is, is it not?) I got the postpartum version of 'the sunday blues' and moped around the condo, not even trying to hide my sadness. I would soon be back in the land of too many people and too many obligations.

We board the plane (an hour late, due to some sort of delay. SEE, even Florida is trying to tell me not to leave) and begin to taxi toward home. My sadness starts to dissipate as I realize that we are together and have provided the girls with memories that they will always have. This alone makes my heart smile and I am am ALMOST as at peace as I was lounging by the ocean. ALMOST.

Home is where the heart is, and at this particular moment, home is at 30,000 feet in American Airlines Flight 1818.

Sadly, there are no palm trees in or near Sears Tower (I will NEVER be Willis Tower!)

Turning into my driveway, I am filled with a happiness that I didn't feel in paradise. I am where I am supposed to be at this point in time. The Lord has put us here, in this house, in Illinois, for reasons we don't know, or question. We are together and about to be reunited with Hank and Z. Our family is once again complete. And, as a welcome home gift, He has set my hydrangea bushes on blooming overload for our return. 

Home is definitely where the heart is, and at this particular moment, it's in the Northwest 'burbs of Chicago, watching backdated DVR shows, surfing the internet for cars, making plans with friends that they haven't seen in a week, and peeing on the weeds that are in desperate need of pulling.

The girl in the blue gingham dress was so right. There really is no place like home. And I'm glad to be here.

I am a Christian and I love everyone (almost*)...

Yes, I repeat, I am a Christian.

Because of this, I love everyone, regardless of who they are holding hands with.

I have seen several people on the news and social media sights saying that a real Christian wouldn't/shouldn't support such an abomination. Correct me if I'm wrong,  but isn't the definition of 'Christian' "a follower of Christ"? If I were alive when Christ was walking on this earth, I would be following him to be with the sinners and the down trodden. Christ didn't gravitate to the perfect people (if so, he would have been very alone). He sought out the ones that needed him and he DIED FOR ALL OF US.

Listen, I know what the Bible says. I also know that it says to 'Love thy neighbor', not 'Love thy neighbor, unless he is gay'.

I was going to keep quiet about this but it's getting out of control. I am tired of being told I am wrong/a bad Christian because I choose to accept others for who they are, whom I believe, they were born to be.

I have three sisters; one by blood and two by name, but I love them equally and will stand up for them always. One of them is gay and it was evident at an early age. This is all the proof that I need to believe with my heart of hearts that she was born this way. Because of the intolerance of others, she wasn't true to herself and it cost her a lot (she also got the greatest gift, so for that we are thankful). I am so very proud of her and the woman that she is. It was not easy for her to admit to her friends and family (not because she was ashamed of who she was but because of all of the hatred out there). She is an amazing girl who has accomplished a lot of great things, but I have never been prouder of her than when she started living her truth.. Now she is happier than she has ever been.

As I was reading all of the post on Facebook I decided I wasn't going to be quiet any more. If I was out and about with any of my gay friends and someone spewed their negativity their way I would stand up for them then, so I feel I should do that now.

The irony of all this debating and opinion giving is that some of the biggest advocates of 'keeping the sanctity of marriage intact' include several divorcees and even some adulterers (I know a lot of people, and coming from a small town, a lot of peoples business). Do my gay friends judge you for that? No. Probably not. Because it's none of their business (They just want the same respect from you). Guess what? These are also an abomination to the sanctity of marriage.

WE ALL ARE SINNERS. I had sex before I was married, as I'm sure the majority of you reading this  did. That is a sin and  God sees every sin the same. A sin is a sin is a sin. It may be a sin that I feel this way about the topic, but I choose to believe that we all are Gods children. I love my brothers and sisters, regardless of who they love. I believe it's my Christian duty to accept Gods children the way they are. I will let Him be the final judge, but while I am alive I am going to teach my kids that they are to treat others the way they want to be treated and to accept people the way they truly are; to let others go about their lives and not stick their nose into matters that aren't directly harming them. I find it hard to believe that the Lord would abandon me for loving all of his creatures.

My sister was born gay. She did not choose it. We, however, do get the luxury of making a choice. We choose to accept others for whomever they truly are, or not. And I choose the former... Unless you harm my kids. Then all bets are off.

I am not going to debate the topic or defend my stance on this. This is who I am. I did not write this to offend anyone. If you disagree, that's fine. I will not judge you because you believe otherwise.  I guess what I am trying to say is...

DON'T JUDGE OTHERS BECAUSE THEY SIN DIFFERENTLY THAN YOU DO.

* I do not love terrorist, child molesters, child and animal abusers, or any of the Kardashian's

I'm the reason they put senseless warnings on products...

Have you ever looked into the sink as you're brushing your teeth and see a piece of your tongue? No? No one? Well guess what. I have. Today.

I had an unfortunate run-in with my Waterpik. I'm guessing I had it turned up to high. I got distracted and instead of hitting my gum line the spray sliced through the tip of my tongue. I felt it automatically and spit, only to see lots of blood and a bit o' tongue. Uh, gross?

Please tell me that I'm not the only one who has ever been savagely attacked by their oral hygiene products. Certainly, this is an everyday occurrence across these here 'Merika's,right?

So, I have learned the following this morning:
1) Waterpik's set on the highest power will, in fact, cut the tip of your tongue off.

B) Mouth wounds bleed. A lot.

C) Gargling with Scope directly after will burn like a mother.

And

4) This will most likely not be the dumbest thing I do today.

Consider yourselves warned, my little nuggets.

Pap Smears and Politics make awful bed fellows...

I had my first glimpse of where our health care reform is heading this morning as I was sitting having my annual gab-fest with my gynecologist. In the midst of our giddy laughter over husbands and kids she asked me how long it had been since my last irregular pap-smear (c'mon ladies, you know you talk about this with your girlfriends too). I told her that I believed it was when H.W. was in office and I still had cheek bones and shoulder blades (ahhh, the 'good ol' days). She said "Well, today is your lucky day! There are new guidelines and if you have had clear paps within ten years you no longer need an annual exam." I believed I snorted and looked at her like she had three speculums aimed at me and said something to the effect of "Who's bright idea was that? Some pencil pusher in a cubicle with no medical degree and no vagina"? She cracked up, composed herself, and professionally went on to tell me that my insurance would pay for it this year but starting next year they were going to start denying annual exams. She was gracious enough to not laugh when she said, "I will gladly do it if you want". To this I exclaimed quite passionately, "Absolutely we are doing it! Because, (1) I am not comfortable going 3 years with no exam when I know how quickly things can change in the body, and (B) I painted my toe nails AND shaved my legs for this, and it WILL NOT be in vain!

Now, correct me if I'm wrong. Was there not just a HUGE debacle over ladies demanding and getting free contraception? Contraception, if I remember correctly, is mainly used for 'FUN' extra-curricular activities. Why do I have to pay for you to 'get your freak on'? Ridiculous, but I digress... Pap smears are the opposite of fun, yet we are going to be penalized for being pro-active and taking care of ourselves. You can CHOOSE to not have sex or use alternate forms of protection. You can not, however, choose NOT to get cervical cancer. I wish it were that easy! Then I wouldn't have had to shave my legs today!

So, if I am hearing and understanding her correctly (and I am, because I asked her several times), I can get FREE birth control, via tax payers, but I WILL HAVE TO PAY OUT OF POCKET (twice, I might add, since I am already paying IN ABUNDANCE for health insurance *and taxes for your free BC pills*) to make sure I am going to be around another year to raise my kids ( who, unfortunately, will have to go through this same crap). Fabulous. 

Women, and parents of future women (like Moi), BE OUTRAGED! This is going to be detrimental to women's health. Much more so than having to pay for your own birth control! 

Breathing in the blessings...

As I sit here reflecting the year so far (all 20 days of it), I am overcome with all the blessings I have. I am also ashamed at the amount that I take them for granted. Nothing is a guarantee. Nothing is promised (except His love for us). Nothing is forever. So, as part of 'The Year of a New Me' (or TYOANM) I am going to try and breathe in all the blessings in my life and not be so blind to the beauty that surrounds me. 

The thing that makes me happier than anything else is my family, yet they are the ones that always see the worst part of me. When I'm tired, they are the ones that suffer. When I've had a bad day, they bear the brunt of it and also have a bad day, simply by association. Therefore, the number one thing on my 'TYOANM' list is to make me number one! Sounds selfish, but it's actually the most selfless thing to do for them. I am taking my health seriously! I am now under the care of a nutritionist who has already helped me more than I expected. I am headache free for 11 days straight and she says it's only the beginning. I am also now 100% gluten free. I have known for several years that I am allergic but never was diligent with the diet...until now. I'm sure that has a lot to do with how well I feel now. How can I ever go back??? 

I also am making a list of all the things that I cherish most. This helps me be in the moment when I experience them; to let them consume me and remind me to thank Him that makes them possible. So far, my list consists of some of the following:

* The way my husband still looks at me, even in the morning as I'm snorting my coffee and grunting at him. After all these years, he still makes me feel like I am the most important person in the world to him.

Me and my love

* The sound of Caty singing in the shower. She is so happy and has such a beautiful voice. I love to stand outside her bathroom door (in a non-creepy way) while she's in there and listen to her. And yes, sometimes I even cry because this is such a beautiful moment. One day this sound will no longer be a regular part of our house and I will SOOOOOO miss that.

The smile makes my heart sing

* The sound of Ali's laugh. She has the GREATEST laugh. It's infectious. The joy on her face in the midst of a good belly laugh makes my heart sing. 

My big love

* I love the way my heart feels when my kids are standing by me in church singing their praises. I am so thankful to live where we can worship freely. I love that they aren't 'to cool' to sing about loving the Lord. 

* I love the sound of my kids laughing with each other. I am so thankful that my girls are best friends. They genuinely like each other and like being together.

But my biggest blessing is hearing these three creatures that share the casa with me tell me that they love me. The sound of their voices expressing their love for me is what gets me through every single second of every single day. For this alone, I express my gratitude daily to God. This is one of those blessings that are not a guarantee and one I can't even fathom the alternative. 

A family that has fun together... has fun together

So for the above blessings, and the countless others that I didn't list, I thank the Lord. He alone holds the key and that fact is not lost on me. I am just so thankful that He has placed these beautiful angels in my life. Thank You for loving me and telling me so in their voices everyday. By them loving me, it's proof that You love me.